Every female heart has longings. As our world aims to fill these only leading us to brokenness Kara points us to God’s life-giving truth. Dig in!
“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
In the heart of every female there is a longing… to be beautiful, to be wanted and to live happily ever after. If you haven’t noticed, our world attempts to fuel these God given girlish dreams in ways they’ll never be satisfied. What begins innocently as playing dress up in Disney dresses later becomes indulging in chick flicks and can eventually lead to a distorted sexuality.
So, how do we perpetuate God’s design for these longings amidst a broken world feeding the opposite?
- Be realistic about brokenness. As our young people are exposed to sexual brokenness through every form of media, we would be foolish to believe they remain unaffected or disinterested. The likelihood of a young girl’s engagement with sexual sin of any kind is too great to be ignored, and its consequences are heartbreaking. Please parent, don’t fall into the trap of believing your daughter is immune to sexual sin. When we’re real about the impact of sexual brokenness in our world, and in our daughter’s heart, we are compelled to fall on our knees in prayer on her behalf. Let us pray for protection from exposure, for a way out when tempted, and for her redemption when she falls.
- Stay engaged and speak truth. Regardless of ‘the front’ she puts on, or how independent she appears, your daughter longs for intentional engagement from you. Disengagement is a subtle, yet common form of betrayal triggering our greatest fears of being abandoned, unworthy and unlovable. For a young girl, these fears may prompt a sexual compromise in order to feel wanted and loved. So, how can we make deposits of worth and value into our girl’s view of self? Engage in her world, cultivate her interests, and include her friends. Maybe you watch her favorite Tangled or Frozen and discuss how these stories imitate God’s love and pursuit of us! Jump into her girlish dreams alongside of her, yet remind her how each one will only ever be satisfied in Jesus.
- Create a safe place. Creating a safe place when it comes to talking to your daughter about sex starts when she’s young and is an ongoing process. It is more than setting up restrictions on your screens and having one serious sit down ‘birds and bees’ chat. Creating a safe place involves being attentive to know, see and really hear her in conjunction with lots of caring questions. When we make topics like beauty, body image, boys and yes, even sex a more regular, ongoing conversation, our girls are more likely to feel safe coming to us when they have questions or find themselves struggling.
Because so many of us carry our own sexual brokenness, it can feel daunting to take the bull by the horns when it comes to our daughter’s sexuality. Instead of stressing about doing or saying the right thing, let us seek God, and trust Him to equip us while protecting and purifying our girls’ sexuality in ways we’ll never be able to!
When do you feel most special? What do you think makes you most beautiful? What is your dream of living happily ever after? Did you know Jesus is able to satisfy each of these hopes? He has rescued you because He delights in you and wants you to be His for all of eternity!