Let’s Talk About Sex


There may be a certain Salt-n-Pepa song in your head after reading this title…that goes to show you’ve lived long enough to be able to pass on some relevant, life-giving truth to the next generation. No singing required!

The decrees of the Lord are firm, and all of them are righteous. They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the honeycomb. By them your servant is warned; in keeping them there is great reward. Psalm 19:9-11

When our kids were little, we introduced the “circle of obedience”.  We drew a big circle and described how much fun, how safe and how good it was when you stay within the circle of obedience. There was a freedom in the circle that could not be found anywhere else.   But once you step out … there are consequences, hurt and the supposed freedom you feel lasts just a little while before it actually makes you its slave. 

The circle continues to be referred to as we have “THE TALK” about sex and every small conversation about sex that follows with them.  Of course, kids want to hide under the covers and throw up a little in their mouth when we talk about sex with them … but it gets better … promise.   Do not stop at the initial talk.  Weave it into conversations in small ways so that it becomes normal (or as normal as they can tolerate).  If we shy away from these conversations, they will shy away from it too. 

While we don’t need to discuss all the specific benefits and joys of sex in a healthy marriage, we can make it clear that staying within God’s “circle of obedience” (striving for purity) is worth it.   Striving for sexual purity will keep us from heartbreak, disease, guilt and so many other circumstances AND allow us (at the right time) to freely enjoy the goodness of this gift.

  1. Talk. Our kids are going to hear about sex from someone.  Let it be you.  Let them feel safe and free to discuss it.  If it isn’t with you, find someone you trust and have them be your kiddos’ safe place to discuss.
  2. Teach.  Teachable moments are everywhere (especially teens).  A commercial, a movie and popular song will almost always produce an example of how the world views sex … good or bad.  Push pause and ask a few questions:  what is this song/show saying about relationships or sex?  What would be the consequences if they (or when they) kept going down that path?  What does God’s Word say about the decision being made?  What do you think?  (Even if they roll their eyes at you … they will catch themselves asking the same questions when you aren’t around!)
  3. React well.  Our body language, our words, and our reactions say so much.  Don’t shut the conversation down with a lecture, but instead listen and lead them to what God’s Word says about the good gift of sex within marriage.

I grew up hearing sex was wrong, bad and sinful.  Which is good as it kept me out of trouble, but bad because I had some retraining of my brain to do when I got married.  It’s a tricky balance (especially with hormonal teens, adult kids) to teach them that it is worth the wait.  In our society and even the church, talking about sex is sometimes taboo and hushed.  These children are ours to teach and teach well.   Consider this:  having sex outside of marriage is no different than stealing from a store … it is sin and there are consequences.  We would talk to our kids about one … therefore we should be steadfast about talking about both of them.  (No matter how much they gross out!)

Camper Corner

Even though rules seem like a waste of fun sometimes, we know they are given to us for so many good reasons … to keep us safe and to let us live life fully within those rules (How much fun would football, basketball, or soccer be with no rules??).  It takes a lot of pressure off of us in deciding just what we should do.   

When you were little the rules were to keep you out of the street so you wouldn’t get hit by a car … now the boundaries are different, but still with the same purpose … to keep you safe.  Keeping our heart and body pure for marriage will be life giving!   What are ways you can strive to stay pure…what steps will you take?

Related Blogs

  • How Does God’s Daily Provision Affect Our Resilience?

    Hey Camp Family! My name is Stacy Garrett and I’m a camp registrar.  Today let’s look at how focusing on God’s provision in our lives can help us be resilient people. Scripture Matthew 6:25 & 26 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your...

    Learn more
  • How can a Child be Confident in their Beliefs while Respecting People with Opposing Beliefs?

    Hey Camp Family! Lauren Stacy, Camp Travis Women’s Director, gives perspective on how to give a reason for the hope we have in Christ Jesus…even when others disagree. Scripture 1 Peter 3:15 But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the...

    Learn more
  • How to Help our Kids Know the “Why’s” of Faith

    Hey Camp Family! Janna Kelsey, Camp Store Manager, shares the importance of equipping our kids with the ability to explain why they believe what they believe. Scripture 1 Peter 3:15 But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for...

    Learn more
  • What is the Importance of Enjoying Nature?

    Hey Camp Family! Madi Tipton, Base Camp Women’s Director, reminds us of so many benefits of enjoying God’s creation out in nature. Scripture Romans 1:19-20 For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived,...

    Learn more
  • How Can Parents Help Kids when it Comes to Pornography?

    Hey Camp Family! Welcome back. This week on Family Matters, we’re going to talk about how you as parents can help equip your sons and daughters to handle pornography. Scripture John 1:5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. Video Reflect Have the courage to approach the topic of...

    Learn more
  • Why is it Important for Parents to Pray WITH Kids?

    Hey Camp Family! Modeling how to connect with God through prayer is one of the absolute greatest gifts parents can give kids. Scripture Romans 12:12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer. Video Reflect Model talking with God this shows He is approachable! Pray early, pray often, pray consistently. Be worthy...

    Learn more